"nobody loves a fat girl, but oh how a fat girl can love"

“From birth to 18, a girl needs good parents. From 18 to 35, she needs good looks. From 35 to 55, good personality. From 55 on, she needs good cash. I'm saving my money.” -- Miss Sophie Tucker (Who was, for the record, one of my most powerful and profound influences and inspirations. Sophie was SOME BROAD.)